Date night with the Mavericks

Fule for Thought

 

Last week, Deb and I actually went out on a date. Our daughter Bree, came over to me and said, “I thought you were a fan of the Mavericks? They’re in Calgary tomorrow night, why don’t you go?” 

I replied that the tickets were too expensive, and she said $40 was cheap. I didn’t know there were $40 tickets, so Deb and I bought two and went. If you haven’t seen or heard much of the Mavericks, you should give them a try. It’s hard to pin down what their style is – it’s kind of like country meets pop meets rockabilly meets Tex-Mex meets Latin swing! Anyway, I’m a huge fan, and we got to be on the floor of Flames Central to see them! We were about four feet from them and it was an amazing night of music … the crowd was half the fun!

One guy in the front got drunker as the show went on, and kept trying to hand the lead guitarist a bolo tie! I’m not sure why he felt that was the thing he had to give, but the guitarist finally had enough, took the tie, and even put it on. You’d think that would finally make the drunk happy, but no! The last song was the band’s biggest hit, “All You Ever Do Is Bring Me Down.” 

Two pretty young girls had been invited up on the stage to dance … the drunk thought he should go too. Now, why he thought he should go is a mystery to me. He wasn’t young. He wasn’t pretty, and I doubted his dancing abilities. This was not a good decision for a drunk, middle-aged guy! Security pounced pretty fast and began to escort him off stage left. The drunk either tried to climb back down himself, or escape, but he fell right off the stage onto the floor! He crashed to the dance floor with a loud thud! Nothing broke his fall except the booze, but he did pop up pretty quick! I wonder how he feels today … I wonder if the Mavericks’ guitarist enjoyed that fall! I bet he and the other Mavericks had a laugh over that one … I know Deb and I did. Did I mention once how much I like slap stick comedy?

I know I’m getting old, as I was pretty disappointed when we got to the concert, and discovered there were no seats! The first thing I thought of was, I like this band, but 3.5 hours of standing on cement? We had found a tiny corner of floor space we conquered as ours, but mine had a giant of a guy in front. Luckily, my friend Rob wound up closer to Drunk Falling Guy than me! All I had to do was move over a bit to see past the “mountain!”

Concerts are also great for people watching. There’s the drunk women out for Girls’ Night who have to pose and take “selfie” after “selfie” to (you know) document their night out! I mean, the concert is not just to see a great band, it’s meant to document just one of the many nights that are these ladies’ “movie-star” lives! I really wanted to photo bomb a couple of their photos, but I knew Deb would kill me. Then there’s the couple who feel that a packed concert floor is just the right place to prove to everyone that when drunk, they “two-step” better than sober! They don’t. Watching them crash and bang into each other and others, brought security over once more. I kind of hoped they’d try and get up on stage with Drunk Falling Guy!

I felt badly for one of my fellow students. He had bought tickets for his dad to see the Mavericks, and got caught in what may have been a “Cougar Trap!” 

If you’ve been to concerts, you’ve seen “the drunk girl dance.” 

That’s where the obviously drunk girl stands and dances (staggering may also be involved) with one hand on a drink and the other arm outstretched above with fingers pointing up and down in time to the music. Well, there was a drunk “cougar” who may or may not have been dancing her way closer to my former student! Deb actually pointed it out, as this woman had strategically shimmied her way right in front of the young lad! She proceeded to bump, lean, and fall back a few times, all while giggling and tossing back her flowing mane. He looked at Deb with a mixture of horror and shyness, only to be met with Deb giving him a “thumbs up!” 

That Debbie, what a sense of humor … poor kid was probably looking for help! He had bought these tickets for his dad’s birthday, only he seemed to be getting the “surprise!” 

We were finally able to all shift a bit to give the poor kid a chance to escape the cougar! Maybe she was able to find “Mr. Right” last night … I’d like to think it was Drunk Falling Guy too! It seems to me they’re made for each other!

(“Fule for Thought” is a slice of life humourous column that appears in the Strathmore Times, written by long-time resident, town councillor, high school teacher, coach, husband and father of two – Pat Fule. If you would like to get in touch with Pat, you can send him an e-mail at Pat.fule@shaw.ca)