The “Wreckers” Chapter 1
Pat Fule
Fule for Thought
There are many changes that happen in education and at specific schools. In PE for example, there have always been students who don’t like PE, and only want to take the minimum of classes so they can graduate. I’m totally fine with this; there are many sports I don’t like either. However, our school has tried a new approach in the last few years that may surprise you! Here’s how it works: you take all the kids who hate PE, don’t like to try very hard, and then, you put them all in the same class!
That’s right, you get all the ones who don’t change, who fool around, who hate activity, who have attendance issues, and you throw them all in the same class! Mmm mmm, now who wouldn’t want that class every day for an hour a day and two hours on Tuesdays!
Guess who gets to teach this class?! Yep, you got it … me! The discussion started in my principal’s office.
“Pat, you have such a knack with kids, they love your sense of humour, and that you care about them. You will be the one who can reach them, and put the fun back in PE!”
Now as I look back on this, it feels like I was being given a lot of news with a little real message slipped in! Like this: “Pat, it’s a great day, the birds are singing, the sun is shining … (your dog died), the sky is blue, it’s wonderful!”
Do you see how I may have been fooled here?! So, the end result is that I teach “Recreational Gym!”
So … I thought I’d share with you some of the stories from this class so far. First of all, you need to know that I’ve taken Rec. PE and named them “the Wreckers!”
The other thing is, none of them ever expected to have a fitness test! When I broke the news to them that we were like any other PE class at school, they seemed shocked and a bit angered.
“What, Mr. Fule?! I didn’t sign up for your class for fitness tests! I mean, no offense, but I always saw this class as a second spare,” grumbled Johnathan.
This is one of my hockey guys, who I’ve dubbed “Johnny Danger” for many reasons! As we were getting ready for the dreaded “Beep Test,” Johnny scowled and said, “look at that kid in the other class, Mr. Fule. D’ya see what he’s doing? He’s stretching Mr.Fule, stretching … I’m out!”
I had to work some positive magic here, I didn’t want this to spread! “You’ll be fine, Johnathan, you’re a hockey player, you’re in shape.” He replied, “ I skate so I can coast, I hit guys, and I block pucks … this body’s not designed for running!”
Another husky student heard this and added, “yeah, I got a question, Fule (yes, it’s true, high school kids often call us by our last names … not sure where or when that started, but it’s here!)”
Anyway, “Stan” asked, “on this fitness test, do I get extra marks cuz I’m fat … and I smoke?”
I told him to do the best he could, and the usual, “maybe you should try to quit smoking?!?!”
To that, he said, “yeah, I guess I should, I’ve got asthma pretty bad, too!”
“You’ve got asthma, you smoke, and you’re about to do a fitness test?!”
I punched 9-1-1- onto my phone screen, to be safe!
The Wreckers are made up of some unique characters. There’s Ryan, who will not take part in this PE class if it’s the first class of the day. So … every Wednesday, Ryan takes a 0 for the sport we play.
“It’s a matter of principal, Mr. Fule. No one should be running before 9 a.m.!”
I have another girl named Brooke, who hates Dodgeball. I always give my students the option to use the fitness room rather than play Dodgeball, so they’re not human targets! Yeah, I thought she’d be safe on the exercise bike, until I saw her pedaling and she leaned forward to adjust the settings.
“BAM,” she rammed her forehead into the bike’s computer monitor! Once I knew she hurt her pride more than her head, I asked her if I should bring up a hockey helmet! Maybe she could sign one out for her grad night, too?! She shook her head, with the “death look” kids can give, but the red mark on her forehead still glowed!
Now getting back to the friends Ryan and Johnathan, you should know that Ryan is native, and Johnathan is white. No, not just white … more like clear, or transparent! In fact, Ryan said, “he’s the colour of raw chicken!”
“Mr. Fule, Ryan’s being racist, he says I’m really white, and I’m the colour of raw chicken!”
Hmm, I hadn’t noticed, but perhaps, he’s … no, stop it, Pat! Johnny Danger asked, “how come he can make fun of me for being white, but not the other way?”
(“Fule for Thought” is a slice of life humourous column that appears in the Strathmore Times, written by long-time resident, town councillor, high school teacher, coach, husband and father of two – Pat Fule. If you would like to get in touch with Pat, you can send him an e-mail at Pat.fule@shaw.ca)