RSA student tells cancer story in play and music

By Laureen F. Guenther Times Contributor

Esther Koepnick was diagnosed with cancer when she was 18 years old. She’s telling her cancer story through her play, Lucy Lost in Cancerland, performed in Rosebud, Jan. 18 to 20.
“In Lucy Lost in Cancerland, cancer is (Lucy’s) boyfriend, and it’s not a healthy relationship,” she said. “It explores the relationship between Ken and Lucy, and how he affects her life and how she deals with that.”
In September 2013, Koepnick had finished high school, planning to work a year before starting Rosebud School of the Arts (RSA) in 2014.
Then she discovered a lump.
She had an X-ray, an ultrasound and an MRI. The lump doubled in size but was still unidentified.
She had a biopsy in June 2014 but to local Winnipeg doctors, the lump remained a mystery. The biopsy was sent to the Mayo Clinic, and finally, on June 26, 2014, Koepnick had an answer.
“The first thing the doctor said was that it was synovial sarcoma. My first reaction to it was, oh thank goodness, it’s not cancer. And the next thing (the doctor) said was, ‘it’s cancer.’ And everything after that was a blur.”
Diagnosis was difficult because synovial sarcoma is very rare. It’s also very aggressive.
Almost immediately, Koepnick started 25 rounds of radiation, then in October 2014, surgery.
“They removed the tumour and they removed the margin around it. They took the skin and muscle graft from my left thigh and they rebuilt everything.”
She was in hospital for two weeks, then home on bed rest another month. She used a wheelchair for a month before starting physiotherapy, then used crutches from December to March.
“I had a lot of time on my hands,” she said. “I journaled a lot. Then out of those entries, I wrote a bunch of music.”
Koepnick began recording an album. “That was one of the things that kept me going,” she said. “I was quite depressed at times, very discouraged. In January, I was still on crutches and I started recording. Then in May of 2015, I released my CD, Unquenchable Hope.”
That spring, Koepnick had a final surgery, and in fall 2015 she came to RSA. Lucy Lost in Cancerland is her Final Project and Koepnick is set to graduate in September.
She may be cancer-free, but Koepnick isn’t the same person she would have been without it. She said she’s known the comfort of faithful friends and lost friends who couldn’t cope with her diagnosis. She’s experienced long, isolating days of recovery. She discovered that “normal teenage issues” look different now. She’s grown to view her physical scars as a badge of honour. And, she’s asked dark questions.
“I made a will,” she said. “I had to think about things and it really strengthened my faith in God. Because you come to a point when you’re just reached the end of it all and you’re like, wow, why is this happening? And that question sometimes doesn’t get answered.”
Koepnick has gained maturity and empathy. And she’s gained confidence and a deeper faith.
“You’re 18 and you’re sort of questioning things. Your faith is becoming your own,” she said. “And that experience really solidified (it). I need there to be a purpose and a meaning, and I need there to be an author of this story that’s bigger than myself. That was really comforting.”
Lucy Lost in Cancerland will be performed Jan. 18 to 20 on Rosebud’s BMO Studio Stage. Tickets are $10 and can be purchased at the door or booked through commonthreadtheatreco@gmail.com or the Facebook event Lucy Lost in Cancerland.