Dog days of spring

Pat Fule

Fule for Thought

 

First of all, a big “shout out” to Mari, a girl who moved to SHS from England. She asked me for one, or at least I think she did … I told her “I don’t speak British,” as it’s sometimes hard to understand her!

Our dog is now 13. We have had to put him through three surgeries, because he tends to form crystals in his bladder. The only way we found out, was that he repeatedly kept ringing his door chime to go out for a pee. We actually thought he was just doing it because he wanted attention, or he was bored. However, one day on about the eighth ring, I’d had it, and I followed him! Sure enough, the little furry guy was trying to do his “job,” but very little was happening. Now, Brodie is a very quiet dog … he doesn’t bark much (I guess it’s here that I should really apologize to the kids waiting for the bus to Sacred Heart, because he DOES bark at them!). It has nothing to do with his owners teaching Public School and you kids going to the separate one … it’s just he likes buses, trucks, and motorcycles. If we’re on a drive on the highway, and he sees a motorcycle, it’s like it’s the BEST thing in the world for him! The tail doesn’t just wag, it whips, it goes in circles … it has even thrown him off balance! 

So, I figured out that between his repeated outside trips, the fact that nothing was working for the old guy, and his look of frustration … SOMETHING was wrong (I felt like “Columbo”)!  

So, on a Saturday night, our vet came in just for Brodie. The vet found a blockage in his ureter, so he had to have some morphine, so a catheter could be inserted. Water was then to be forced through the catheter, pushing the block crystals back into the bladder. This is where we found out what a “tank” our dog is. The first shot never even phased him, and he kept walking around sniffing everything. So a second shot was given. 

NOW, he was comical, he staggered around with his tongue hanging out, and every now and then one of his legs would slip out from under him! He looked like he’d just left “last call” at the Green Hotel!! 

However, he WAS focused enough to know something was wrong when the thermometer was inserted in his butt! There was a look of disappointment on his face directed at me! It was like he was thinking “really … you let the vet put that there … why?”  

He also didn’t like the catheter insertion, and he had a bit of a sad look on his face, like the “party” was over!

The following Tuesday was his surgery day. We were told by the vet that he may find the sutures a bit tight at first, and to keep an eye on him. Keep an eye on him? He was embarrassing; and it HAD to happen when we had company over! We discovered that the stitches were a bit snug, because no matter how we tried to sit him, or lie him … “something” was always poking OUT! I’m trying to be delicate here, and he really DID look happy … too happy.  No matter what we did, we could not get a certain part of his anatomy to retract … it was awful! Oh, and then he just had to hop up on the lady for a closer visit. It was like having a porn star for a dog … and he wouldn’t listen when the director said “cut!”

So, he had to be opened again, with a bit more “slack” in the stitching, so he’d stop showing off so much! During the week of recovery, I had to give him a daily dose of pills. It’s hard to give a dog pills. Oh sure, some of the smaller ones are no problem, but the larger ones takes a real knack. I even googled it on You Tube to learn. This is the only time Brodie has ever nipped me. You have to hold his jaws open, shove a pill to the back of his mouth, then close his mouth and hold it closed until he swallows. I wasn’t fast enough to get my “pill hand” out on time and he clamped down! The other frustration was that this dog could always find the pill inside some meat. I had to keep hiding it in the middle of a meatball … he’d find it, and drop it on the floor. The dog who can’t find his chew bone until I step on it, is able to find a tiny pill in a meatball!

So, he’s on the mend, but whenever I say: “car ride,” he’s not sure he can trust me. And if we even head in the general direction of the vet clinic … he begins to shake! Dogs do have memories, he sure does, and it’s going to take a lot of car rides to make him trust me and the red van again!

 

(“Fule for Thought” is a slice of life humourous column that appears in the Strathmore Times, written by long-time resident, town councillor, high school teacher, coach, husband and father of two – Pat Fule. If you would like to get in touch with Pat, you can send him an e-mail at Pat.fule@shaw.ca)