The Dark Side of Psychology
Pat Fule
Fule for Thought
I had a Psychology professor at the University of Calgary. He lectured a lot on human behaviour, and as well, the behaviour of people in group settings. He told us that he even did a little “conditioning” program on his baby boy!
Anytime the little guy had an unpleasant experience, like hunger cries, an upset stomach, or teething, he would show him a colour photo of his wife!! I think it’s amazing, and definitely a little crazy that he would do that (ironic, eh…that a Psychology professor might be a little “crazy” himself)!
After a relatively short time went by, the baby boy started to associate his mom’s face/appearance with unpleasant things! He even would start to cry whenever he saw her! He had come to associate her image with unpleasant, or painful things. I don’t know HOW he would have done it, but his wife MADE him “un-condition” their baby!
This professor went on to tell us that we all have a comfort zone around us, a “bubble” that we only let people we’re close to, come near. He gave us the example of a near empty theatre. He said people will come in and sit away from other people. He told us to watch this behaviour, as they would purposely sit with a friend(s) with a few seats of a “buffer” between them and strangers.
He also said if you really wanted to see them get REALLY uncomfortable, sit right next to one of the people, rather than any seat far away! This person would begin to fidget, and try to create space … they may even leave to return farther away.
This actually happened to me at the recent Teachers’ Convention. I had arrived at the Keynote Speaker, and picked a row with only two guys in it. One was at one end, the other near the middle aisle. I settled in a few seats away from each guy, ready to be inspired, when two ladies came in. They had so many seats to choose from, yet they sat RIGHT next to me! My prof’s example had come true!
First, I felt infringed upon, and a bit annoyed. Before I knew it, I was trying to create more space, by leaning to the left and away from the lady next to me! We all rose for the National anthem, and I was trying to decide if I should sit back down next to them, or over one or two seats! Then, of all things, I was worried that move might offend them! I didn’t know them, why should I care about their feelings, when they came RIGHT into my own personal bubble! So, I sat back down, and leaned to the left for the whole speech. I was trapped by them and what I thought was good manners!
When I was 14, my friends and I did a kind of reversal of this experiment (this is one you can easily try, too). I grew up in Canmore, and we always went to Banff’s Lux theatre for movies. The theatre was packed, and no more seats were available. My older brother had to go to the bathroom and then the concession. That was a big mistake! He thought he’d make it back on time … he was wrong!
The theatre was now VERY dark, and we were doing our best to blend in with the crowd. You never want to totally slouch … that’s a dead giveaway. Instead, we stayed in a proper seated position, but we faced away from Gary, as he walked the aisle searching for us! I know, I know, this is a bit mean, but when you’re 14 and you get a chance to stick it to your older brother … all’s fair game! It was almost sad, except for the silent laughing part. He vainly walked down and up the dark aisle whispering our names.
“Pat!” I could hear, in an increasingly strained voice. By now he was being “shushed” and even tried to get his bearings on the opposite aisle, still whispering! After many more pleading calls of my name, he resorted to my friends’ names. I begged them, but they took pity on him … flagging him down! This had been good “sport” and Phase 2 was him trying to shuffle across our row, loaded with popcorn and pop, facing even MORE “shushing”!
Over the last few years of high school, we continued to hit the Lux Theatre for movies, but Gary never left us alone for the concession! Once, in another crowded movie, he rose to go. I asked, “Really, Gary….you REALLY” want to do that?”
He sat back down uncomfortably, and stayed where he was. If he did have to “go”, he never said a word. He sat with an uncomfortable look on his face, and every now and then, shot a glare at me! I didn’t know it at 14, but maybe there WAS something to this “conditioning” stuff!