Kids say and do the darndest things – teachers, too!

Fule for Thought

 

I have had the opportunity to interact with kids and teens of various ages. Because of this, I have come to realize that many surprises can come from these young people. Even so, there are often incidents that really stand out. There was a time when I may have been shocked, and even though I’m older (wiser?), I still get surprised.

We just completed our 15th JETS Basketball Camp, and I was lucky to have had one of the nicest collection of kids/teens EVER! It really makes you feel that things aren’t as bad with Youth as we may think; there are many great young people out there. Still, they do say things that shock. Each time we wrap up a session, we do a “JETS Cheer.” 

Lately, I’ve been leading them in a count to three in different languages … then we yell “JETS!”

One of the mornings, I had decided to use German as the language. As soon as I said we’d be counting in German, one little boy excitedly yelled, “oh, just like Hitler!”  

He even put his finger under his nose for a mustache!! I had to quietly say that we‘re just using German, but the language really didn’t mean we were cheering for Hitler!  Whew … got out of THAT one!

Years ago, when my daughter Breanne was 5-years-old, we were meeting a couple who were friends of ours. The man’s wife bent down to Breanne and said, “You have the most beautiful brown eyes, where did you get them?”  

With no hesitation, Breanne said, “At Mawket Mall!” (Market Mall)  

The lady laughed, and we had to tell her that we REALLY didn’t shop THAT much! Maybe we actually did, as Breanne seemed to know all about the mall!! She became a highly trained shopper, after all!

When I coached the Sr. Boys Basketball teams at SHS, I took my son Brennen on a lot of road trips. He loved hanging around the guys and they were always good to him. He became a real “Gym Rat” and loved to hang out, and shoot as much as possible. One trip saw the Spartans head out to Okotoks to play Foothills Composite. Brennen was about 6 or 7, and after the game, we were sitting and eating at a DQ. One of the guys was joking around with Brennen.  

“So, Bren…..you got any girlfriends?”  

I’m still stunned when I remember this, because Brennen never hesitated, he just said “if I did, do you think I’d be HERE?”  

We all laughed, and I’ve always wondered how that answer came to a little kid!

Another one of my JETS kids had done really well at our Fall JETS Basketball program.  Near the end of the session I was complimenting little “Billy” (Fake Name).  

“Wow, Bill … you did great this year, you’re listening, and you TRY really hard! Maybe when you get to high school, you can be one of my coaches!”  

Again, with no hesitation, “Billy” said, “you’ll be DEAD by THEN!”

OUCH….that hurt! I told him I’d try to stay alive as long as I could! I reminded him of this comment when he graduated from SHS, but he didn’t remember it!

One of my Grade 11 English students was sitting near the back of the class as the bell to start, rang.  I was handing back essays, and gave one to “Frank.” He had made similar errors on his paper as the last one he did. I jokingly “shook” him by the shoulders, and laughed, “WHEN are you going to stop doing that mistake?”  

Then I went to the front of the room to start the class. In the time it took me to hand out ONE more paper and get to the front, “Frank” had used a white sheet of paper to make a fake neck brace! He sat there with a painful expression, dropped his pen, and said, “I can’t pick it up … my neck’s really bad … not sure WHAT I’m gonna tell my folks!”  

The whole class (and I) got a solid laugh out of that one … it actually LOOKED like a neck brace!

Lastly, I made a huge error on the day of a June high school Final in the SHS Gym. The supervising teacher had gone over the Exam Rules on the microphone behind the podium. When he was done, the rest of us teachers were to begin supervising.  

“Look at these kids,” I whispered to a colleague. “A lot of them are barely awake … they’re not ready for this Final!”  

One of the guys in the front row motioned to me and whispered out loud, “Mr. Fule, the mic’s still on!”  

I was mortified, I didn’t know how many kids heard, and I was VERY embarrassed! Luckily, almost all never heard my comment, and the ones who did quietly laughed, as they started their tests! That taught me to limit my “editorial” comments, AND make sure the mic is always off!

(“Fule for Thought” is a slice of life humourous column that will appear in the Strathmore Times, written by long-time resident, town councillor, high school teacher, coach, husband and father of two – Pat Fule. If you would like to get in touch with Pat, you can send him an e-mail at Pat.fule@shaw.ca)