A-B-C easy as PS3

Fule for Thought

 

Lately, I have re-discovered the joys and frustrations of video gaming. It’s always been a love-hate thing with me, as I enjoy the pastime, but it can pull me in, and can become an obsession. Back in the dark ages of 1978, my university roommates and I chipped in and bought one of the first video game machines. Many of you will remember the incredible graphics of the black and white “blip” that you could actually control on the TV screen!  

Wow, were we ever simple back then! Remember the excitement and thrill of controlling that blip, as you played tennis? Then you could switch over to hockey and even have a white blip as your goalie! If you squinted your eyes, you could almost picture Ken Dryden or Mike Palmateer in net! You could feel the excitement of the crowd … the tension of each “save” or goal! Actually, if you DID squint, you’d lose the blip!

My daughter was never as taken with video games as Brennen, and in order for us to ever beat him, we had to team up against him! It would be the two of us versus him in Sega’s “Wayne Gretzky’s Hockey.”

That was the game, where if you scored a certain way, the goalie’s net would burst into flame, or he’d be trapped under the net, like a cage … good times. But nothing compared to shooting Brennen’s air ship down in flames in “Star Fox.”

Breanne and I would cheer, do a victory “rub it in” dance, even if we were being “out-killed” 32-1!

Nintendo 64 was great, and I’m sure many of you raced in Mario Carts, or played as James Bond in Goldeneye. Sadly, Brennen was always able to learn and remember game places, hunt me down, and “kill” me at will. Breanne and I continued to gang up on Brennen … it was the only way to survive in the games we played! I think it brought us together as father-daughter, too! After all, what could be better than blasting away at your brother, while your dad cheers you on?!

Deb has always felt I needed a hobby. I guess she felt drinking really wasn’t one! You all know there’s no safe way for me to EVER work with power tools, OR sharp devices!  So … I thought I’d get back into video games. These games have come so far!! Football  games can be set for different weather conditions, and you can even see the snow fall, or the steam coming from players. All that realism just made it worse, as it really felt like I WAS being destroyed on the playing by Brennen AGAIN. He’s the type of player who tells you how the controls work AFTER you’ve started, so that you get crushed while “learning.”

We were playing a “Nazi Zombie” game, where you have to destroy them as they keep attacking … all very stressful. Brennen decided it would be “fun” to have us play online.  Soon, I was a soldier on screen “running” for my life! I’ve discovered that if you have NO sense of direction in real life, it’s the same in video games. Everything looks the same to me … it’s like watching Fred Flintstone’s car drive and the same background just keeps going by. Over and over, I’d get “killed” by zombies and Brennen’s “soldier” would have to find and revive me. The problem was we were online, and I could hear voices from all around. I was sure one of them was mocking me! He kept saying that my name (you sign in as a code name) “sucked” and that no one should help me! I asked Brennen who that was and his reply was: “oh, that’s some little kid in California, he thinks he’s better than he is!”

I was being mocked by a kid I didn’t even know! 

Lately, I’ve been playing “Arkham City,” a Batman game. Because of my lack of direction, I continue to get lost in this video city. It’s fun, but very frustrating. I’ve even had to turn to Aaron, one of my students, to be my advisor. Whenever I’m stuck, he tells me what to do to get past the spot, so I can move on. If it wasn’t for him, I’d be stuck in one place for the whole game! I think Debbie is questioning her PS3 gift me last Christmas … she has to listen to the yells of frustration, and the odd curse words of frustration. Of course, I always have my trusty sidekick Brodie by my side. EVERY superhero needs a sidekick! So, I’ll sign off now … I just saw the “Bat Signal” … it’s time to kick a little criminal butt! It’s not easy being a crime fighter, but someone’s gotta do it!

 

(“Fule for Thought” is a slice of life humourous column that appears in the Strathmore Times, written by long-time resident, town councillor, high school teacher, coach, husband and father of two – Pat Fule. If you would like to get in touch with Pat, you can send him an e-mail at Pat.fule@shaw.ca)